With this in mind, here's a guide to navigating the apps without accidentally or, you know, intentionally, you dick acting like a douchebag. Some apps are for arranging dates and making new friends; others lend themselves to scheduling more I'm guessing you don't need me to tell you which do what Grindr, I see you.
Find love with the best LGBT dating apps for iOS and Android
If you're on an app that's mainly used for hook-ups, keep small talk to a minimum. There's a time and place for asking a guy about his favorite Britney deep cut, and it's not when he's just sent a totally earth-shattering nude. Sometimes a guy will recognize me on a sex app and message me to say he enjoyed an article I wrote.
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I'm always flattered, but then slightly disappointed that he didn't also ask me to bang. Hey, I'm human. Even on a hook-up app, it's definitely possible to let someone down gently. If he doesn't take the hint, tell him your mom's in town and insists on vetting every guy you meet.
Just like that, he'll be up out your face. These days, straight-up racists aside, more insidious forms of discrimination can and do creep in. When someone asks, "Where are you from?
Similarly, think twice before putting something like "Venezuelan guys to the front" on your profile. You may think you're playfully expressing a preference, but really you're fetishizing someone for his ethnicity.
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Does being "masc" make him better in bed or a more loving potential boyfriend? Of course not. And in my experience, he'll probably end up doing a Miss Vanjie impression after his third drink, anyway. Look, no one can tell you what should or shouldn't turn you on. We all have different tastes and that's what makes sex and dating so exciting.
Best LGBT dating apps for Android and iOS
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Best LGBT Dating Apps for Android and iOS | Digital Trends
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It's also possible that platforms themselves are skirting their "hookup app" reputation as an attempt to court investors. Last year, after Grindr's rebranding, a Chinese gaming company owned by a straight billionaire acquired a majority stake in the company ; last month, the same company announced plans to purchase the company outright. Apps may also be responding to a distant threat: It only makes sense then that apps would diversify their services, whether that means helping men meet partners for sex or single travelers connect with other queer men in the cities they visit.
So things that may appear as techy gimmicks—such as a switch to toggle between "Mr. Right Now"—might also signify a more nuanced dating culture to come, one that recognizes how romance, sex, and friendship have historically blurred in the gay community. Follow Jon Shadel on Twitter.
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